September 18th 2006

The craziest thing I’ve ever seen on a baseball field. Normally on any September 18th I’d be celebrating with empanadas and some of the old vino since its Chilean Independence Day. On this occasion I was celebrating with Dodger Dogs and $10 beers. Neither my mother nor I had planned to celebrate the holiday since it was a Monday so I invited her to a baseball game. It happened to be fleece blanket night which is her favorite promotion and I bought myself a Russell Martin t-shirt which I put on immediately. We got some decent field level seats on the 1st base side which drives me nuts for some reason, I prefer sitting 3rd base side but on this occasion it allowed me a chance to heckle the oft injured and overpaid Dodgers right fielder JD Drew as well as the San Diego Padres bullpen.

After just one inning my mother and I were just happy to have gotten our blankets since the Blue Crew was already down by four runs against Jake Peavey who would eventually win the Cy Young Award in 2007 but I consider the single most over rated pitcher in the league. The diehard in us however would refuse to leave a ballgame early. We were rewarded.

By the time Jake Peavey left the game in the 6th inning the Dodgers had come back to tie the game at four. But, much to my chagrin by the 9th inning the Dodgers were down 9-5 in what seemed like an insurmountable lead especially with Trevor Hoffman as the Padre closer, but instead of him walking out from behind the bullpen gate I see some guy named Jon Adkins who I’d never seen before and coincidently I haven’t seen since. This pissed me off a little bit. I felt somewhat insulted that Trevor Hoffman wasn’t coming in to pitch. I paid good money for this game and if I’m going to see the Dodgers lose I better get to see the second best closer the game has ever seen damnit! So I worked my way towards the Padres Bullpen and yelled something at Hoffman. I don’t remember what it was but I do remember a security guard grabbing me by the collar and saying, “Good job buddy, don’t do that again.” Hoffman wasn’t even warming up!

So this Adkins guy goes 1-0 (one ball – zero strikes) to Jeff Kent, the most prolific hitting second baseman in baseball history, on his second pitch Kent took him deep to center. Great! We’re still down by three runs. Oh look at that, Trevor Hoffman is warming up. I WILL NOT BE DENIED! Adkins then took JD Drew, the most prolific injury prone outfielder I’ve ever seen, to a 2-1 count and on his 4th pitch, Drew took him DEEP to right field. Back-to-back homeruns! We’ve seen this of course. No big deal. Oh look at that, Trevor Hoffman is coming into the game. This guy hadn’t blown a save against the Dodgers in over five years and had converted 24 consecutive save opportunities, you could almost hear Hells Bells by AC/DC blaring in the background, but of course this is Dodger Stadium… No Hells Bells for you! No way this guy had enough time to properly warm up. His first pitch to a rookie Russell Martin, who’s father had just come down to LA from Montreal to see him play, went yard. BACK-TO-BACK-TO-BACK! The crowd goes bonkers! This is rare. I’d seen this before but only on TV or on Sports Center. Next up was Marlon Anderson who was a late season trade acquisition and wasn’t impressing me at all. First pitch, gone! Everybody goes ape shit! BACK-TO-BACK-TO-BACK-TO-BACK! This was just the 5th time in baseball history that a team hit four consecutive homeruns. Not sure but probably the only time four consecutive homeruns were hit in the bottom of the 9th inning to tie a game. Un-fucking-believable I tell ya.

Apparently Trevor Hoffman only needed two more pitches to completely warm up since he got the next three guys out fairly easily. Extra innings…

Aaron Sele comes in to pitch the top of the 10th. Great. After all that we get Aaron Sele. Basically we’re gonna lose now. Sure enough he gives up a double to Brian Giles, an intentional walk to Adrian Gonzalez and a single to Josh Bard. Padres 10-9 Dodgers. Will Trevor Hoffman go two innings? No. Enter Rudy Seanez. This guy is terrible. We still have hope. After issuing a walk to Kenny Lofton the entire stadium, 56,000 deep got on their feet as they heard Low-Rider blast from the stadium sound system. Nomar Garciaparra who had been battling injury after injury, who’s limp was now more noticeable than ever before, reminded everybody of Kirk Gibson although much like a pitcher in the middle of a no-hitter, nobody wanted to say anything. Nomar worked himself a 3-1 count which is a great hitters count and took the next Rudy Seanez fastball deep into the LA night sky. There was no doubt from the crack of the bat it was going to be a homerun. The Dodgers exploded from the dugout. Handicapped fans jumped from their wheelchairs. Girls ripped off their tops. It was pandemonium at Dodger Stadium.

Moral of the story; “It aint over till its over.” Yogi Berra

*Post Script: After the game while in the Stadium elevator on our way up to our car, we met Russell Martin Sr.

As I approach this momentous milestone in my life I’ve thought back on many memories that have given me so many laughs over the years.  So many stories from different times in my life continue to be told over and over never once thinking; I need new stories.  I turn 30 in exactly 30 days and have decided to share these stories with everybody one at a time.  Some are a bit embarrassing, others are risqué, and some have been known to make people laugh so hard they had to go hunting for their inhalers.  So many of these stories have common themes that I’m a bit embarrassed to admit that my life isn’t as exciting as it may seem since the variety will revolve around a handful of major themes and a few major times in life.  I’ve tried very hard to keep as many names secret but then again, so many of these stories have been told over and over again that the characters are already known.  So here you have 30 vignettes in 30 days until I turn 30.

Lets start with the most recent story; a new story; something I have probably only shared with two or three people.

UNTITLED #1

For the second straight year I’ve travelled to our nation’s capitol to advocate and lobby on behalf of my favorite project in the world; The Hollywood Freeway Central Park.  Last year I stayed with an ex girlfriend who was difficult to stay with for 4 days but still made the trip interesting at times.  The rollercoaster stay was far too much drama for me to want to stay there again this second time around so I decided to stay with my colleagues.  It also would have been quite awkward staying with her again considering she is now living with her fiancé.  Regardless, I extended an invitation for her to come visit me so long as it didn’t conflict with any of the meetings or dinners I had scheduled; In other words, really late at night or really early in the morning.

After a long flight into Dulles and a fairly quick car ride into DC the pressure of our schedule was beginning to become a reality.  After a quick shower and change of clothes I was on the rooftop bar of the W Hotel having cocktails with my colleagues and then we quickly went to a spectacular dinner at Poste in the Hotel Monaco.  After dinner a few of us decided it was far too early for bed seeing as we were all on West Coast time so we hit up Old Ebbitt Grill for a nightcap or 8.  After stumbling a block or so back to the hotel, I set my alarm for 7am and as soon as my face hit the pillow around 2am I was asleep.  Normally 5 hours of sleep are enough for me but I didn’t get 5 hours.

At 5am I get a phone call: “Hey, I’m downstairs. Come get me.”

Really?  The least I could have gotten was a warning. Maybe I don’t stay out so late or maybe I don’t go out at all.  Regardless, I asked for it by saying “…really late at night or really early in the morning. “  Yes, I was excited to see her.  No, I didn’t complain.  We talked for a little bit, tried to catch up on each other’s lives, we laughed, joked and even opened up to each other a little once that comfort level we once shared had returned and then clothes started flying off.

At a little after 7am, my alarm had already gone to snooze twice when her phone rang.  I immediately started laughing because I knew it HAD to be her fiancé wondering why he had just woken up alone.  I had assumed she would ignore the call but instead she shushed me and said, “Shhh.  Its him.” Right as she answered I was yelling out one of my favorite Princess Bride quotes: “HAHA! Your pig fiancé is too late!”

Moral of the story is, Princess Bride can be quoted no matter what life throws your way!